Disneyland for the Fainthearted

Sleeping Beauty's Castle

We have clearly failed as American parents. Our first family trip to Disneyland must honestly be registered as a flop. Maybe it’s because we have supremely sensitive children, who just really don’t go in for the whole “sharks-in-the-water” vibe. Maybe it’s because my Fictional Husband (FH) hates crowds, hot dogs, popcorn, roller coasters and noise. But most likely it’s my fault, my own deeply divided nature. I wore the princess dresses my father brought back from his trips abroad, took ballet, and avidly watched the Disney shorts of Alice in Wonderland and Peter Pan that he screened on his old reel-to-reel in the downstairs den. But I also played football and basketball with my brothers, and didn’t fail to notice that Disney princesses—with the notable exception of Cinderella—are almost always pictured without feet. So I guess it’s no surprise that my under-inoculated family didn’t jump eagerly into the “Happiest Place on Earth” and emerge with the requisite contented smiles plastered on their faces. Continue reading